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Prospectus Hit List for August 23



Hit List for August 20 Hit List for August 27
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

RkTmWLW1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC%Playoff%1-Day7-Day
1

89

39

85.9

83.8

82.2

.666

.670

96.7%

3.3%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Rafael “Carita” Devers: This was decided before the Childish Bambino article, you see
2

77

50

85.2

85.2

85.0

.654

.659

78.0%

21.5%

99.4%

1.1%

0.9%

Carlos “I Am Groot” Correa: Well, the Astros’ lead is rapidly disintegrating, so ...
3

79

47

77.5

78.9

78.3

.622

.627

3.3%

96.5%

99.9%

0.1%

0.4%

Lance “MIA” Lynn: Weird; Gary Sanchez and Aaron Judge are MIA, too.
4

73

53

76.9

76.7

73.0

.594

.599

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Corey “Kluber” Kluber: It genuinely reflects his “personality”
5

76

51

71.9

74.1

73.4

.581

.586

21.5%

69.2%

90.6%

-1.3%

11.4%

Matt “Sweet Swingin’ Joyce: He is not legally allowed to go by that name when facing southpaws.
6

67

61

75.4

78.9

79.0

.587

.582

22.1%

18.2%

40.3%

-12.0%

-20.5%

Rich “D. Mountain” Hill: Who knew that Rich Hill was the Rob Gronkowski of baseball?
7

72

53

72.4

71.8

71.6

.576

.571

67.9%

25.5%

93.4%

1.1%

-0.3%

Steve “Speedpass” Cishek: Wait, are we sure this wasn’t supposed to be Tyler Thornburg’s nickname?
8

71

55

72.6

72.3

72.3

.572

.567

75.5%

7.8%

83.3%

2.7%

-1.6%

Ronald “Sabanero Soy” Acuna Jr: Because they wouldn’t let him print “F*** Jose Urena”
9

71

56

72.9

72.7

72.1

.568

.563

54.1%

17.7%

71.8%

2.3%

17.0%

Jake “Lambo” Lamb: Makes sense, since he’s always in the service bay.
10

66

61

65.4

72.7

73.3

.546

.551

0.0%

0.5%

0.5%

0.2%

0.2%

Tyler “Mini Horse” Glasnow: Because both are difficult to control.
11

71

57

70.8

69.7

68.3

.546

.542

18.8%

44.9%

63.7%

7.2%

19.8%

Dakota “Dak” Hudson: There’s an argument to be made that Hudson is only thriving because of the Cardinals’ impressive offensive line.
12

64

63

70.5

70.1

69.5

.540

.535

2.1%

3.4%

5.5%

0.1%

-0.9%

Mike “2 Little 2 Late” Rizzo: Ok, not really, but it should be.
13

71

58

67.4

69.2

69.0

.536

.531

13.2%

47.4%

60.6%

5.5%

-0.5%

Ryan “Ocho” Braun: Named after the number of weeks he misses every year.
14

63

65

67.6

64.7

65.0

.508

.513

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

-0.1%

Andrew “Heandog” Heaney: OK, but is he a sandwich?
15

69

57

62.1

64.3

64.9

.516

.511

23.8%

18.8%

42.6%

3.7%

22.1%

Kyle “Two One” Freeland: Named after a traditional Rockies starter’s fly ball to homerun ratio.
16

68

58

63.1

64.3

64.2

.515

.510

22.4%

15.9%

38.3%

-9.9%

-29.6%

Rhys “Big Fella” Hoskisn and Tommy “Bigger Fella” Hunter: BIG BOY SZN
17

72

56

59.4

61.9

63.2

.501

.506

0.6%

9.0%

9.5%

-0.1%

-12.8%

Nick “Hubba Hubba” Vincent: Because having a good self-image is important; especially when you’re a Mariner.
18

63

65

63.5

61.1

61.2

.486

.481

0.1%

0.4%

0.5%

-0.5%

-2.2%

David “DaveHuman” Freese: Uh, thanks for the clarification?
19

60

66

60.4

55.3

53.1

.454

.459

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

-0.0%

-0.0%

Gabriel “Little Guardado” Moya: I will not make fun of this nickname; it is beautiful.
20

62

66

58.3

57.2

59.4

.463

.458

0.0%

0.2%

0.2%

-0.2%

-3.5%

Derek “Last Name” Holland: This joke is about as hip and fresh as the Giants’ roster.
21

56

70

58.9

58.6

58.7

.461

.456

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Travis “Lil d” d’Arnaud: Well it couldn’t be Andrelton Simmons’ nickname, so
22

58

69

55.8

55.8

56.3

.445

.450

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Ken “100 Miles” Giles: For the average distance Giles must travel every time he gets demoted back to Triple-A.
23

57

72

58.0

55.3

57.2

.441

.446

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Joey “Pico De Gallo” Gallo: This is basically a subtweet of 2014 me.
24

56

71

56.8

56.9

58.1

.449

.444

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Joey “In Flanders Fields” Votto: Because being a Red is almost as bad as being in a WWI trench. Just with less offense.
25

52

75

51.7

50.0

48.1

.397

.402

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Michael “The Plumber” Fulmer: He’s never available when you need him.
26

48

78

48.2

50.4

48.6

.387

.392

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Jose “Mal Tiempo” Abreu: That’s what White Sox fans root for every time they have a lead after five innings.
27

51

77

46.6

50.4

52.8

.392

.387

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Adam “Acon” Conley: AND YOUNG JEEEEEEEZY, TRYNA TAKE IT EASY
28

50

79

51.4

48.1

50.7

.388

.383

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Franchy “Cordy” Cordero: This is a crime against his beautiful first name.
29

37

90

43.1

40.9

42.9

.323

.327

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Trey “Boomer” Mancini: Nice to see a Boomer inherit an economic mess for once.
30

38

89

40.9

40.7

40.2

.315

.319

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Adalberto “La Guinea” Mondesi: How do you not go with “Raul, Son of Raul?”