Prospectus Hit List for August 1
Hit List for July 30
Hit List for August 4
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.
| Rk | Tm | W | L | W1 | W2 | W3 | HLF | AHLF | Win Div% |  Win WC% | Playoff% | 1-Day | 7-Day |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 |  | 44 | 64 | 49.2 | 50.2 | 48.4 | .441 | .421 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | -0.0% | 0.0% |
| Someone high up on a mountaintop somewhere knows what the Rockies are doing but he’s almost certainly suffering from altitude sickness. | |||||||||||||
| 2 |  | 44 | 65 | 43.9 | 44.0 | 46.8 | .410 | .429 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| Hard to believe the Astros traded Jarred Cosart and broke up the 2017 World Championship pitching staff before they’d even got together. | |||||||||||||
| 3 |  | 48 | 59 | 48.6 | 49.4 | 49.2 | .456 | .476 | 0.2% | 0.0% | 0.2% | -0.2% | -0.2% |
| Extending Kurt Suzuki is like buying a Suzuki and naming it Kurt. It’s a fine idea and quite cute, but it’ll probably break down soon and all your money will be gone. | |||||||||||||
| 4 |  | 43 | 65 | 42.1 | 40.2 | 42.0 | .387 | .406 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| What did you want them to do, trade a DL spot? | |||||||||||||
| 5 |  | 45 | 62 | 48.3 | 51.7 | 51.1 | .458 | .439 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| Jake Arrieta allowed three hits in seven innings during his comeback campaign yet can’t escape my brain calling him Jake Areola. | |||||||||||||
| 6 |  | 48 | 61 | 47.7 | 48.1 | 48.9 | .442 | .422 | 0.0% | 0.1% | 0.2% | 0.0% | 0.1% |
| Not one trade. Maybe they had a glitch and had to turn their commodore 64s on and off. | |||||||||||||
| 7 |  | 48 | 61 | 47.1 | 47.3 | 47.2 | .435 | .415 | 0.0% | 0.2% | 0.2% | 0.1% | 0.0% |
| The Diamondbacks are one of those posters at the mall that become a 3D picture of a boat if you stare at it long enough, except when you stare at this one it becomes a bunch of small disassociated color splotches. | |||||||||||||
| 8 |  | 48 | 60 | 49.8 | 45.6 | 45.8 | .438 | .418 | 0.0% | 0.2% | 0.2% | -0.1% | 0.0% |
| The trade deadline went down and the Padres still don’t have a GM. But that’s probably not that important. | |||||||||||||
| 9 |  | 48 | 60 | 47.9 | 49.8 | 50.4 | .454 | .474 | 0.0% | 0.2% | 0.2% | 0.2% | -2.3% |
| I’d make a joke about moving deck chairs on the Titanic but the Red Sox traded the deck chairs. | |||||||||||||
| 10 |  | 53 | 56 | 53.2 | 52.4 | 52.1 | .483 | .503 | 1.7% | 2.2% | 3.9% | 1.7% | 2.4% |
| So much for my proposed Paul Konerko for Derek Jeter trade idea that would have made sense. | |||||||||||||
| 11 |  | 52 | 56 | 55.6 | 52.9 | 52.3 | .493 | .473 | 1.4% | 2.5% | 3.9% | -0.6% | 1.4% |
| By not trading Bartolo Colon the Mets are signaling they can compete next season. Or it signals they like hilarious pitcher at-bats. | |||||||||||||
| 12 |  | 53 | 55 | 51.8 | 50.8 | 50.5 | .477 | .457 | 1.2% | 3.0% | 4.1% | -0.7% | 3.1% |
| Another year, another deadline, another missed opportunity to trade Giancarlo Stanton to your favorite team for a bunch of nobodies. | |||||||||||||
| 13 |  | 58 | 47 | 56.5 | 57.7 | 56.9 | .545 | .565 | 83.9% | 3.4% | 87.3% | -3.1% | -7.6% |
| The Price is right! Ha ha… a huh huh… huh… huh… oooo… | |||||||||||||
| 14 |  | 53 | 55 | 54.4 | 54.5 | 54.5 | .501 | .521 | 4.8% | 4.7% | 9.6% | -2.7% | -9.8% |
| The worst part of the Justin Masterson trade is now people in St. Louis movie theaters are going to have to be careful. Justin Masterson is tall. | |||||||||||||
| 15 |  | 53 | 55 | 53.5 | 59.1 | 58.9 | .520 | .540 | 4.1% | 6.0% | 10.1% | -0.6% | 0.2% |
| “Holmes, how could you trade David Price in a pennant race?” “Simple, my dear Watson! We’re not in a pennant race!” | |||||||||||||
| 16 |  | 55 | 52 | 53.7 | 48.6 | 50.0 | .484 | .504 | 9.4% | 7.1% | 16.5% | 3.4% | 2.6% |
| The Royals are all in, y’all! Fear the powder blue! | |||||||||||||
| 17 |  | 55 | 52 | 50.2 | 49.6 | 50.4 | .479 | .499 | 8.6% | 9.9% | 18.4% | 1.0% | -13.8% |
| Brian Cashman revealed that a quick and easy "what about Drew” text message to Ben Cheringon precipitated the Yankees easy acquisition of Stephen Drew. This prompted a flurry of texts from Cashman to everyone he knows asking “what about your money.” | |||||||||||||
| 18 |  | 58 | 48 | 60.7 | 60.1 | 59.6 | .562 | .542 | 74.8% | 10.7% | 85.5% | -3.1% | -1.5% |
| Jerry Blevins: 2.97 FIP, 5.45 ERA. Drew Storen: 3.07 FIP, 1.53 ERA. | |||||||||||||
| 19 |  | 62 | 47 | 61.4 | 63.4 | 61.7 | .570 | .550 | 85.6% | 12.3% | 98.0% | 0.7% | 13.3% |
| The Dodgers failed to get David Price or Jon Lester but they did keep Vin Scully and you tell me who is more important. | |||||||||||||
| 20 |  | 54 | 54 | 55.3 | 53.3 | 53.6 | .501 | .481 | 5.2% | 13.2% | 18.4% | 3.1% | -2.6% |
| Reports: The Reds tried to take Billy Hamilton out of the game to trade him but they couldn’t catch him. | |||||||||||||
| 21 |  | 60 | 50 | 59.6 | 59.1 | 58.8 | .540 | .560 | 38.1% | 21.9% | 60.1% | 4.1% | 25.0% |
| Sure everyone around them got better, and sure they didn’t do anything worth while, and sure they still have some huge holes in their roster, but… where was I going with this? | |||||||||||||
| 22 |  | 57 | 50 | 53.7 | 56.7 | 56.5 | .523 | .503 | 38.9% | 22.0% | 60.9% | 7.3% | 4.0% |
| John Lackey should love St. Louis. And St. Louis, if they love swearing, guns, big trucks, bigger trucks, large hats, larger hats, and swearing, should love John Lackey. | |||||||||||||
| 23 |  | 60 | 47 | 56.9 | 55.2 | 55.6 | .532 | .552 | 49.2% | 22.3% | 71.5% | -5.6% | 6.8% |
| When introduced to new reliever Andrew Miller, Orioles skipper Buck Showalter accidentally struck out. | |||||||||||||
| 24 |  | 56 | 52 | 60.5 | 60.0 | 59.4 | .546 | .566 | 0.1% | 23.0% | 23.0% | 1.8% | -3.7% |
| Austin Jackson is better than the hamsters in roller balls the Mariners have been starting in center field and that’s all that matters. | |||||||||||||
| 25 |  | 57 | 51 | 54.0 | 56.0 | 56.9 | .518 | .498 | 19.8% | 26.6% | 46.4% | -5.4% | 3.4% |
| The Pirates tried to trade for Pedro Alvarez’s swing but Altoona wouldn’t budge off a final offer of six hot dogs and two large slushees. | |||||||||||||
| 26 |  | 58 | 51 | 56.9 | 55.5 | 55.1 | .517 | .497 | 22.7% | 28.3% | 50.9% | 0.6% | 0.4% |
| The Braves would have done something but they got caught up with Sharknado 2 and were too afraid to cross the carpet to pick up a phone. | |||||||||||||
| 27 |  | 60 | 49 | 57.7 | 56.7 | 56.1 | .529 | .509 | 36.0% | 29.6% | 65.6% | -1.5% | -5.1% |
| The Brewers' janitorial staff picked the wrong day to steal every phone in the team’s offices and hide them in the toilet. | |||||||||||||
| 28 |  | 66 | 41 | 70.7 | 68.7 | 68.0 | .639 | .657 | 61.9% | 38.0% | 99.9% | 0.1% | 0.0% |
| Billy Beane was dismayed to learn that with the trade deadline over he wouldn’t be able to add another ace pitcher next week. “What?” he thundered. “Whose dumb idea was a deadline?” | |||||||||||||
| 29 |  | 58 | 50 | 57.0 | 56.8 | 56.2 | .524 | .504 | 14.4% | 51.3% | 65.7% | -0.6% | -16.5% |
| “Did we get anyone?” -- Hunter Pences’s crazy eye. “Nope! I don’t think so!” – Hunter Pence’s other crazy eye. | |||||||||||||
| 30 |  | 64 | 43 | 62.9 | 67.7 | 67.0 | .611 | .630 | 38.0% | 61.4% | 99.4% | 0.0% | 0.4% |
| The accumulation of G's on Tyler Skaggs' jersey caused forearm tightness and he had to leave the game. One G is enough, America. | |||||||||||||
It's Friday, Friday, traded for depth on Thursday.