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Prospectus Hit List for September 25



by Matthew Kory

Hit List for September 24 Hit List for September 26
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

The Phillies are the 14th team to reach 0 percent playoff odds; the Rangers are the fifth to reach 100 percent (again).

RkTmWL W1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC%Playoff%1-Day7-Day
1

93

60

92.3

92.8

91.2

.603

.584

97.6%

2.4%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Nats’ fourth inning looked like this: double, single, kick in the shins, single, punch in the neck, double, urinating on the team flag, walk, homer.
2

91

62

88.6

93.6

92.2

.597

.616

97.3%

2.6%

100.0%

0.0%

0.1%

Every time Adrian Beltre does something good, his teammates rub his head, which makes him flip out. You'd think he'd get the message and start striking out more in crucial situations.
3

83

70

88.1

88.1

89.7

.570

.590

0.0%

11.0%

11.0%

3.1%

2.9%

The Rays have been mentioned as a possible destination next season for James Loney. Apparently wining with Carlos Pena's .199/.334/.356 doesn't present enough of a challenge.
4

89

64

87.6

88.2

89.2

.578

.598

85.7%

14.1%

99.8%

0.5%

3.7%

40-year-old Andy Pettitte walks off the DL after almost three months and throws 11 innings of shutout ball. This is exhibit 421 why people hate the Yankees, and love Andy Pettitte.
5

83

71

87.5

88.5

85.5

.559

.540

0.0%

91.1%

91.1%

6.8%

15.4%

Yadier Molina is so good at pitch framing that he can de-frame his opponents' pitches by subtly bumping the opposing catcher with a pool cue. You've never seen him up there with a pool cue before, right? That's how good he is!
6

88

65

86.4

85.5

85.7

.565

.545

2.4%

97.6%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Can the Braves make up five games on the Nationals with only nine games to go in the schedule? The hopes and dreams of many a Strasburg-Shutdown hater rest on this possibility.
7

92

61

86.2

83.8

80.9

.560

.540

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Joey Votto's weird slash line since returning from injury is still going strong: .314/.493/.392.
8

84

69

85.0

87.1

88.8

.563

.583

0.2%

22.8%

23.0%

3.6%

-6.2%

How good is Mike Trout? He was just named Associate of the Month at a consulting company he's never worked for in his life!
9

86

67

84.6

80.3

81.8

.544

.563

2.5%

71.8%

74.3%

-7.6%

-15.2%

Oakland's lead in the Wild Card over the Angels is down to two games. If only they'd listened to me and signed Albert Pujols and drafted Mike Trout they wouldn't be in this mess.
10

89

64

83.9

81.8

80.3

.547

.528

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.2%

Giants hat: purchased. Bandwagon seat: acquired. So, who's this guy with the long hair? Is that the Panda?
11

82

71

83.4

80.7

79.6

.532

.552

67.6%

0.0%

67.6%

-1.3%

-14.7%

Adam Dunn leads baseball in strikeouts, walks and homers. Triple Crown!
12

81

72

81.7

84.2

84.2

.541

.561

32.4%

0.2%

32.6%

1.5%

11.3%

Detroit’s thousand-run offense on pace to score 736 runs.
13

77

76

81.4

81.3

80.5

.523

.503

0.0%

0.3%

0.3%

-0.8%

-1.4%

Jason Kubel hit his 30th homer of the season last night. Just think where the Diamondbacks would be if they hadn't signed him! Also out of the playoffs? Well, yeah.
14

79

74

80.7

81.5

79.0

.523

.503

0.0%

4.8%

4.8%

-4.3%

0.4%

The Brewers' 5 percent chance to catch the Cardinals is the same percentage as the energy that is transferred down the food chain from prey to predator. I thought you’d want to know that, Brewers fans.
15

79

74

77.7

76.1

76.8

.506

.486

0.0%

3.8%

3.8%

-1.8%

-10.4%

The Dodgers are down to a 4 percent shot at making the playoffs this season. But hey, they have Carl Crawford next season so no worries.
16

77

76

77.3

79.0

78.5

.509

.489

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

-0.6%

That number right up above, the one that shows the Phillies' playoff chances, is now zero.
17

88

66

76.3

73.6

75.3

.508

.528

14.3%

77.4%

91.7%

0.0%

18.1%

The Orioles played a doubleheader, which they split, and in which they were outscored. Double duh.
18

75

78

74.3

75.3

72.9

.486

.466

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

-3.6%

At this point the Pirates' best chance to end the season with a better-than-.500 record is to fake being sick and then claim they would've done it if they weren't sick.
19

69

85

73.6

76.2

76.5

.479

.499

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

James Loney has hit .247/.281/.306 for the Red Sox. NFL replacement refs say: MVP!
20

72

81

72.3

70.4

72.3

.469

.489

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

I took the kids out to the farmer's market to buy berries, but apparently berry season is over so they didn't have anything. (I figured anything is better than talking about the Mariners offense.)
21

73

80

71.2

71.8

70.9

.469

.449

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Mark Kotsay's away split isn't as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, it's not good (.283/.338/.383) but it's not the instant baseball death I was expecting.
22

70

83

71.2

66.8

66.7

.449

.469

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Jeff Francoeur: .238/.292/.370 in 566 plate appearances, 25 non-intentional walks to 109 strikeouts, and four stolen bases. He's been caught seven times. The moral: Sometimes you don’t need a punch line.
23

70

83

70.2

73.9

76.0

.474

.454

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Looking over their stats, this thought struck me: if the Mets had some good pitching and some good hitting, they'd probably be a decent team. Then I thought, nah, they'd still be the Mets.
24

67

86

70.2

66.0

67.8

.443

.463

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Get your tickets to see Ricky Romero in the Bad-But-At-Least-Not-Outright-Embarrassing tour! (Extremely limited engagement)
25

66

87

65.4

67.9

69.0

.438

.419

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Future ex-Marlin Heath Bell called future ex-manager Ozzie Guillen a liar. That, and 66-87. Is it too late to pull the funding on that new ballpark?
26

64

90

64.9

67.5

67.4

.428

.448

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Know who is third in baseball in RBIs? Josh Willingham! M-V-P! M-V-P!
27

59

94

64.3

61.2

61.1

.401

.382

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Tyler Chatwood has a home ERA 1.13 lower than his road ERA. He'd be the ideal Colorado pitcher if his home ERA weren't 4.94.
28

59

94

63.3

59.6

60.1

.395

.376

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

After months and months of trying, analysts in the Cubs front office have finally deciphered the holy grail of baseball analysis: the text of the betting book that Doctor Emmett Brown took back from the future in Back to the Future III. Your move, universe.
29

63

91

59.2

64.2

64.9

.408

.427

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

No, no, don't worry about it. Vinnie Pestano's got the blown save and the loss. No. No! He’s got it. Don't worry nothing about it, ya hear? You can get the loss next time.
30

50

104

54.0

54.1

54.3

.345

.327

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Astros have eight more games in the National League. Enjoy watching the baseball cul-de-sac that is pitchers hitting while you can, guys.