September 9, 2002

The Week in Quotes

September 2-8

by Derek Zumsteg

STEP 1: ADMIT YOU HAVE A PROBLEM (TO THE DETROIT FREE PRESS)

"This place stinks -- from the front office right on down."
--Jose Lima, Tigers pitcher, after being told Andy Van Hekken would take Lima's rotation spot

"If I can't pitch on this team--the worst or second-worst team in baseball--where am I going to pitch? If I can't start on this ballclub, I must be the worst pitcher on earth."
--Lima

"What are they going to do--release me? Let them, I don't care. I don't figure in the plans for the rest of the year. I'll just go home. I haven't seen my son in three months."
--Lima

"They're just going to stick me in the bullpen--again. I can sit down there like an idiot and wait for the phone to ring when the score is 10-1, because they won't use me in a close game. It's the same old crap and it's not going to change. They can clean house, bring in 25 new guys, and it won't change because it starts right up there at the top."
--Lima

STEP 2: GET RELEASED

"When you are in our situation where you are struggling at the big league level, you are looking for some promise for the future. It shows that there is some pretty good talent down there."
--Dave Dombrowski, Tigers GM, on releasing pitchers Jose Lima and Jose Paniagua and calling up nine players from the minors

STEP 3 - PROFIT

NOT BEFORE WILL CLARK

"I'm going to tell everyone, my kids and my grandkids, that I hit my first home run off a future Hall of Famer. I just won't tell them who it was."
--David Ross, Dodger catcher, on hitting a home run off Diamondbacks infielder Mark Grace, who pitched mop-up in a 19-1 loss

WILL CLARK NEVER HAD TO PITCH

"Something slow down the middle."
--Ross, asked what pitch he homered off

"That poor kid is going to get his first home run ball and it's off Mark Grace. I feel sorry for him. ... I didn't have a scouting report on him. Obviously he can hit 65 mph fastballs."
--Grace

"Gracie's the best. He had it going. That's my dream. I want to get on the mound someday."
--Paul LoDuca, Dodgers catcher

"I have a new-found respect for pitchers. My butt aches, my legs ache, my arm hurts. But if you can have five minutes of fun in a game like this, it's worth it."
--Grace

"I apologize to the Dodgers if they feel we made a mockery out of it by pitching Mark Grace. But there was no positive to be had throwing any of the relievers we had left in our bullpen. Only bad things could have happened."
--Bob Brenly, Diamondbacks manager

SWINGING BATS

"I closed my eyes and used the Force."
--Nomar Garciaparra, Red Sox infielder, on hitting a low-and-away pitch from Mike Mussina for a single

"He has a live bat. My first day in the majors, I was afraid, a little tight. I was just happy to get my first game out of the way. Joe? His first hit is a home run. He's ready to go."
--Carlos Lee, White Sox outfielder, who (like Will Clark) homered in his first at-bat, on teammate Joe Borchard's first-hit home run

BECAUSE YOUR MARKET'S TWICE AS LARGE AS THOSE LAST TWO

"You wouldn't put another team in the same market with Boston or in the same market with St. Louis or the same market with Minnesota. Why then 30 miles from Camden Yards?"
--Peter Angelos, Orioles owner, on the possibility of moving the Expos to the District of Columbia or nearby

THE REST

"We had a lot of game left. I knew Rusch's pitch count was up and I didn't think one run was insurmountable."
--Bruce Kimm, Cubs manager, on a loss to the Brewers

"Of course, it's all in your head, but you don't want to be the one who ruined it. Guys have the same pregame ritual, or they sit in the same spot in the dugout. I think everybody's washing their uniforms, though."
--Billy Koch, Athletics pitcher, on superstition during the streak

"It's insane. Anything and everything goes their way. Nothing else to call it but insane and retarded."
--Joe Mays, Twins pitcher

"He better look both ways when he's crossing the street."
--J.P. Ricciardi, Blue Jays GM, when it was pointed out that Roy Halladay was the team's only starting pitcher to make it through the season

"I coached third base for Tampa Bay in 1998 and '99 and they got their tails kicked. But now, four years later, they've got an awfully nice looking team. That's the point we're going to get to. It's just going to take some patience."
--Greg Riddoch, Brewers farm director

If you would like to submit a quote, please email Derek and be sure to include both the quote itself and a URL pointing to the quote.